Preparing the Way

My bags are packed, I'm ready to go...

The best and biggest decision I have ever made for myself and hopefully the start of a new life for me and for my daughter.  We journey together tomorrow to have bariatric surgery in Mexico.  Our insurance company does not allow for any treatment for obesity at all so we felt that we had to look outside the box and get creative to be able to afford this avenue of treatment.

This is a journey of self discovery, one in which we both hope to come out the other side as thinner, healthier, happier versions of our current selves.  For all the years that I taught my daughter that selflessness is important in my actions, this will now show her that we do need to put self first.  Without treating ourselves as important we can not then treat others as important, for love and acceptance does truly start with self.

Walking the plank tomorrow will be cathartic, diving deep into the unknown, two independent women seeking more, better, a deeper understanding of self and a willingness to give up in order to gain.

As the surgeon cuts, he will be carving out what makes me, me.  Severing the umbilical cord of food from my body, as he stitches the fresh wound he will take from me my comfort, my companion, my abiding love for salty, sweet, crunchy bits of solace from the world. In its place he will impart restraint. He will sew in control.  With forcefulness I will embrace this new way of nourishing my body, leaving my mind to seek alternate gratification.

I will advise you to keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times...tighten up that seat belt this ride promises to be bumpy.