Change is ever-present. To stay the same is to regress, yet here I am. Fear grips me, but I don't know the core of my fear. Food has always allowed me to repress my feelings, my thoughts, my fears and here I am stripped of my best friend, my constant companion, I stand now naked from the world of feelings, thoughts and fears. Where do I turn, what do I do, who am I now?
I stand before the mirror that is my life right now and recognize nothing. Fear freezes me, suffocates me from within, unable to move, forward or backwards I am left with nothing, I hope nothing, I plan nothing, I do nothing. The calendar moves but forgets to take me with it, I see the clock clicking away, marching forward but I do not feel the passage of time.
Where to go? What to do? When to do it? Some days I just sit and feel the rise and fall of my chest, why have I come so far, just to exist? I have hidden so long under the cloak of fat that I have forgotten...
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